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The Green Lantern commentary

So I, obviously, went to see The Green Lantern today. With my tendon-in-leg-torn, foot-in-brace, 6' tall on-crutches brother. Which was an experience in and of itself.

But on to the movie. First, let me just say, the opening intro sequence - the one that was trying to be all Fellowship of the Ring? It was an epic fail. It was too much info, too fast, with too many wyrd camera angles - and, lest I forget, me trying not to burst out laughing when they said The Yellow Light of Fear. I mean, seriously, the whole Green Light of Will was bad enough, but, seriously? I'm sure there's some Judeo-Christian overcoming the devil subtext in this, but I can't be entirely sure. The movie certainly seemed like it had a religious subtext, if not the usual messiah one.

And, I mean, it had it's amusing points - the girl poining out that a mask that only covers your cheekbones and a skin-tight suit don't really hide your idenity for one - but, for the most part, really? The fact that the Green Lanterns can make anything they want out of their thoughts alone gave it all a cheesy quality, and the whole training segment looked like someone had taken something from Full Metal Jacket or something and stuck it in space. With aliens. In skintight green suits. In fact, the more I think about the skin-tight green suits and the fact that they were on male, or male-like aliens, the more I really wonder. 'Cause usually, you know, they go the 7of9 approach when they do skin-tight cat suits.

My overriding thought though? It was that this Hal guy is a sociopath, what with the whole no-fear thing and all. And then, poof, he's suddenly all fearful, and then, poof, he's a decent human being. I guess that's charecter development, of a sort.

The name "Green Lantern Corps"? that and the fact that you have to recharge your magical ring seems pretty silly. Plus, a big, bulky glowing ring is going to get noticed when you go out in public, and sooner or later your not in-the-know friends are going to realize you're wearing the same ring as the guy in all the papers and get suspicious.

Plus, was there some "living up to your father's legacy" thing going on that I missed? 'Cause it seems that the hero, the girl, and the vice-enemy were all friends as kids or something. And cliche.

And the part where the immortal guardian aliens say that they've tried to harness fear before and failed miserably because fear cannot be harnessed? And then go and make themselves a fear ring? That was just, well, stupid. And a play for 30 more min of screen time, 'cause it dragged on for a 105 min movie.

What else can I say? The special effects were good, if not particularly special. Cartoony, really, especially in light of Thor. And hardly interesting. I mean, it wasn't bad, it just wasn't good either. I wouldn't buy it, but I might watch it if it came on TV repeatedly, like Iron Man does. Only Iron Man has a decernable plot and a story arc, so, again, maybe not.
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