To Live (drabble 2)

The Ancient!John 'verse: To Live (drabble 2 of ???)
Characters: Ancient!John Sheppard, Nicolaa de Luera Pastor (OFC)
Pairings: John/OFC
Summary: Rodney was not John's first love.
Warning: underage sex (he is 19, she is 14)
Series: drabble #2 of ??? in the Ancient!John 'verse. Part of Locality.
Notes: You know how sometimes you just see a picture and a whole story just hits you, viscerally, right in the gut? Like it's there and you just can't not tell it? Well that's the case with this for me:
Note Bene: In chronological order, this is the second drabble.

To Live

It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day-to-day basis.” Margaret Bonnano

Because this is Nicolaa at age 14, when Iohannes has just come home from 'Tethys' after the Battle of the Palamede. It's been three years since she's seen him, this man who practically raised her, who taught her everything she knows, who was (is) her only friend. And she's so happy to see him home, alive, she kissed him right in the middle of the Gate Room, in front of everyone.

They're alone now, in one of their secret hideaways (because it was always easier to hide away than deal with the adults, who only ever treated her as a child and him as an Abomination), and she's just closed the door behind them. She's terrified that he's going to tell her that they can't do this, that he doesn't want to do this, that he doesn't feel the same. He's been her whole world - her entire life - and all she wants is to be his.

The butterflies are brewing a small storm in her stomach.

In a moment, Iohannes will cross the room, put his hands on either side of her face, and kiss her with all the feeling he has for her. His hands will stay on her face for a long instant before sliding to her shoulders. They will push the flimsy straps of her dress down and, after she frees her arms, Nicolaa will wrap them tightly around him and never want to let go. His hands will slide down to her waist, her hips, the backs of her thighs. He will whisper how much he loves her into her hair after she's asleep, but she won't hear. She'll never hear those words from him until much later, until it's almost too late.

Five years from now, this will be the scene of their final breakup.  Glass will be shattered and plates smashed. She'll be wearing another ingénue dress and there will be cuts and scratches all up and down her arms and tears pouring down her face.

Fourteen years from now, there will be more cuts and scratches on her arms, more blood - too much blood - and she will be dead in his arms.

But now she is fourteen and young and in love and there are butterflies brewing up a storm in her stomach, and she is about to be the happiest she will ever be in her all too short life.