SGA_king-john

Sigh

I fraking hate this time of the year.


Amazingly, I have very little against Christmas, though it's always confused me why Western Christianity makes such a big deal over what is essentially a birthday. That whole rising from the dead thing seems rather more impressive. But whatever.

No, I really, truly hate exams. I had such a stress reaction after yesterday's exam that I couldn't do anything, just kinda sit there and vaguely read fic. I actually had trouble falling asleep for the first time since like May, and kept waking up every half hour or so sure I was going to be sick. This morning wasn't much better, what with my Capstone presentation, but at least I passed. Thank god. I started to feel a little better than that, but mostly it's just more of the same. Which sucks, because I have to finish this genetic algorithim I started writing a month ago and I just don't have any energy.

One of the suggestions I got today for dealing with my depression is to read the Gospel of Mark and accept Jesus into my life. Which, okay, might work for some people, but isn't going to cut it for me. But it was well intentioned, so I didn't say anything. It kinda always amuses me how people think God can solve all their problems. Personally, I don't care what anyone believes, but the thoguth that some guy in the sky personally cares about my life but will condemn me to hell if I don't believe in him is a little much, even for me. I'm more likely to believe Pluto being Ascendant when I was born has more effect on my life, and then only because gravity is a thing that's been proven to exist.

But whatever. As I said, it was well intended. Mostly, I think this semester ending is going to be better for my despression. Graudating will be a nice change of pace as well. And I'm hopefull for next semester. My grad classes look like they'll be interesting and well spaced. But right now I just want friday to be here already.


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"HUGS" Feel better hon. No magic pill or anything to offer except the hug and a hope you will find some happiness in the future.
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